Where's Waldo's Mom?
Education is not preparation for life; education is life itself. John Dewey
On my first day of school, I figured I'd stand out like a banana in a bowl of grapes, but surprisingly, nobody seemed to notice (or care) that a 47 year-old student was in line behind them in the cafeteria, walking past the row of them in the bathroom without stopping to check her mascara, taking furious notes as if she were actually interested in the lecture. In fact, I've since learned from a few classmates (and one prof) that although they figured I was an older student, they had no idea how old.
Huh. I thought it was obvious. Just in case you're unsure, I came up with a few clues to spot middle-aged female students who are young enough to fit in, yet old enough to be your mother. She's the only one who:
...drives a minivan
...drops her kid on the frontage road before parking in the lot so he doesn't bear the shame of peers knowing his Mom goes to the same college.
...watches that kid walk up the sidewalk, rooting for him, hoping he's happy.
...has a few gray hairs in her blond pigtails.
...isn't bouncing her knees all during class after having consumed candy bars and soda for breakfast.
...wants to smack the kids who don't hold the door open for others, always come in late, act as if they're doing the world a favor by their mere presence.
...fans herself while all the other students wear sweaters and complain about the air conditioning.
...walks into the wrong classroom during the third week of school, shrugs and leaves, as though not mortified by such a nerdy faux pas
...asks the prof how big the type is on today's test because she forgot her reading glasses.
...waves the A on her history test in front of the kid, as if waiting for a raise in allowance or keys to the family car
...nods knowlingly as the prof talks about the Nixon years and the Viet Nam war without having read the text.
...has the urge to hug everyone in the room just because they're all so damn fresh and on the verge of their young lives.
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Well done on jumping in and heading back to school. Enjoy! This was my first September since 1997 not having classes to go to - and I'm having withdrawal symptoms!
Posted by:Imelda | October 01, 2006 at 12:40 PM
Well let me tell you dear, you don't look a day over 43. (LOL) I was the old man at massage school seven years ago and I was 39. Oh well, thanks for reminding me I'm getting old.
Gail
Posted by:Gail | October 02, 2006 at 11:46 AM
Wanna have some fun..Wait til J is dressed and wear exactly the same thing..but don't let him know it til you walk into the school. LMAO
Glad skuul is goyn so well fer you..thinkene about goyene bak miself! Inglish mayjer...
Posted by:janitordave | October 03, 2006 at 02:20 AM
Congrats on going back to school! More and more of us "old" folks are doing so. You forgot to mention all the cellphones and text messaging in classrooms. :)
Posted by:Liora | October 04, 2006 at 10:24 PM
Imelda--I think I'm having time-withdrawal so maybe I'll trade places with you next semester.
Gail: I cheated. That picture is 3 years old but the only one I have of me in reading glasses.
Dave: LMAO! I just might try that on Friday.
Liora: The profs are really cracking down on cell phones thank goodness. There is, however, a whole lotta vibrating going on in people's backpacks. heh
Posted by:ellie | October 05, 2006 at 11:16 AM