For as far back as I can remember, I've conducted my life in reverse. According to family legend, my ass-backward way of life began during labor, when I was positioned face up in the womb. Thanks to his small hands, my mother's obstetrician was able to reach in and turn me (ouch!) so that she could deliver more easily. Apparently a little too easily, because the other part of the story is that I was born in the elevator between the third and fourth floor of the hospital on the way to the delivery room.
Given my begninnings, I suppose it should come as no surpise that I've spent most of my life doing things the opposite of normal. I read magazines back to front, flip downward through TV channels and radio stations instead of up, and click my way from the bottom of the blogroll to the top. Heck, I still can't even fasten my bra without pulling the strap around front and hooking it like a twelve year-old. Another example: I married at sixteen then divorced two years later, when I got pregnant. While most of my peers were going to proms and preparing for college, I was going to the grocery store and preparing for parenthood. I spent my youth on grown-up things, became a grandmother at 39, buried both my parents before my youngest child was in the third grade.
I believe it was George Carlin who once supposed we should be born old, live life backwards until we re-enter the womb and turn back into the energy of our parents' smiles. I think he was onto something (except the vagina part--that's just gross). I say we baby boomers should take over the playgrounds, ride in the front of shopping carts, finger paint, take naps followed by milk and cookies. And while we're at it, let's all give ourselves a gold star just for making it this far in one piece.