Reverse Trends

"The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm." Aldous Huxley

For as far back as I can remember, I've conducted my life in reverse.   According to family legend, my ass-backward way of life began during labor, when I was positioned face up in the womb. Thanks to his small hands, my mother's obstetrician was able to reach in and turn me (ouch!) so that she could deliver  more easily.  Apparently a little too easily, because the other part of the story is that  I was born in the elevator between the third and fourth floor of the hospital on the way to the delivery room.

Given my begninnings, I suppose it should come as no surpise that I've spent most of my life doing things the opposite of normal. I read magazines back to front, flip downward through TV channels and radio stations instead of up, and click my way from the bottom of the blogroll to the top.  Heck, I still can't even fasten my bra without pulling the strap around front and hooking it like a twelve year-old. Another example: I married at sixteen then divorced two years later, when I got pregnant. While most of my peers were going to proms and preparing for college, I was going to the grocery store and preparing for parenthood. I spent my youth on grown-up things, became a grandmother at 39, buried both my parents before my youngest child was in the third grade.

There are advantages to living life in reverse. I've gotten to spend my forties doing fun things I missed in my teens, like getting 300 braids woven into my hair, having flowers painted on my toes, dancing wildly at music festivals, and jumping on the bed with girlfriends if we feel like it. As I approach fifty, I don't expect this backward trend to change. In fact, I'm thinking about going back to college, maybe get my MFA in Creative Writing.

I believe it was George Carlin who once supposed we should be born old, live life backwards until we re-enter the womb and turn back into the energy of our parents' smiles. I think he was onto something (except the vagina part--that's just gross). I say we baby boomers should take over the playgrounds, ride in the front of shopping carts, finger paint, take naps followed by milk and cookies. And while we're at it, let's all give ourselves a gold star just for making it this far in one piece.

Technorati Tags: aging, perimenopause, menopause, hot flashes, getting older, pregnancy, body image, womb, essay, blog, george carlin, baby boomers, writing, writers, birth, prose, women, hormones,

Comments

[Loretta]

Good grief, Ellie~ I had the same thought this week about getting an MFA. Must be a message from the cosmos.

[janitorinadrum]

Amen sista! Just put my Legos away before work.

[Sue Richards]

When you put it like that, life makes so much more sense. I too have approached everything in life backwards. Until very recently that choice has been rewarded multiple times. Now, for very unexplained reasons I'm trying to plug myself into a hole I don't fit into.

You give me fuel for pondering sista! I'm off to the playground for a romp on the monkey bars!

Sue

[Connie]

I have also thought about getting a Masters of Fine Arts in Writing. I loved your entry on living backwards. You are such an amazing person! And one heck of a writer! You could probably teach the writing classes!

[Jennifer]

"I'm thinking about going back to college, maybe get my MFA in Creative Writing."

You inspire me fifty ways to Sunday. And back again. In reverse.

[ellie]

Loretta: I think it must be a collective consciousness thing.

Gus: Save me some Tinkertoys?

Sue: Transform the container, not the contents!

Connie & Jennifer: Thank you for your kind affirmations of creativity and inspiration.

[Fran aka Redondowriter]

Ellie, you have always made me smile and admire you right from the first time I saw your writing. And moreso on the few occasions I've had to meet you in person. You are one unique woman. Would you do your MFA in a low-residency program? When I see the writer's magazines, I note the tons of ads for low res programs. I can see you making this dream come true.

[Lisa Hill]

I also flip through magazines backwards and usually do a lot of other things backwards also. I don't think I was breech, but if I was that would explain a lot of things about why I am the way I am.

I love your blog. I am having so much fun reading through the archives.

Keep the posts coming...they are great.

Blessings,
Lisa

[Jenna]

I didn't have much of a childhood...so now, at 30 I'm in total agreement about enjoying my life to the fullest. I have a 7 year old son and a 2 year old son and they are helping me to remember...what it is to be little.

I love that picture as well...

God Bless,

Jenna

[ellie]

Fran--as you can see from my latest post, the seed has been firmly planted. Definitely low-res on the MFA. Thank you for your years of encouragement.

Lisa--Nice to see another kindred (backwards) spirit. Normal is relative.

Jenna--Always great to read comments from new readers or longtime lurkers. As the popular bumper stickers say, it's never to late to have a happy childhood.

[craige]

Oh crap. No one ever told me that I was supposed to stop putting my bra on that way.